Base the reflection of your true self on the way you live your life rather than what the mirror tells you.

Mirror Here, Mirror There, Mirror Mirror Everywhere

So yesterday I went to the P.A. Dutch Farmer’s Market to buy spices as I was just about out of everything. I have to pass the donuts and baked goods to get to the spices. I swear I could hear the blueberry fritters whispering to me.  And I was sooo tempted but 1) my muffin top jeans are now not making such a big muffin and 2) I was sure that if I did get one that I would see a fellow trainer or a member and it would be just my luck that they would catch me in mid bite – and it would be really awkward, like half the fritter was hanging out of my mouth and my eyes were open like saucers and I would blush while trying to cram the fritter in my mouth as if to hide it. And we would both be embarrassed – me because I’d be the fritter hoover and you would be embarrassed for me, oozing fritter out of my mouth while trying to smile. So you can see why this would be too much trouble. But that has nothing to do with what I want to write about I just thought I’d share.

Do you want to take a trip through my mind?  Good. I thought so. I was teaching TRX the other night and in my head I was thinking “Form is good, pacing is good, everyone is on tra – holy cow, that’s my butt. ”And there it was. Large as life in the mirror. They’re everywhere! Not butts (well those too) mirrors. If you’re in the hair or beauty business you know what I mean. For the past 15 years or so I’ve been surrounded by mirrors. I cannot escape my reflection….and it’s very disconcerting.

You have your skinny mirrors where you can look at yourself all day long. If you’re smart, you have a full length skinny mirror in your bedroom so that when you are getting ready to go out or go to work you look in that mirror and you look amazing. Always.

Then you have your not so skinny mirrors. Clearly these are broken.  These are often in places you would least likely expect them – someone’s living room, a local establishment, the gym. These make you look shorter and wider and make you think that you are not looking as amazing as you thought (that’s what happened to me in TRX), and you then start second guessing not only your choice of outfit, but your other mirror. Which one is right?  I go with the skinny mirror every time. I mean why torture yourself more than you already are over the whole mirror thing?

And finally you have the dreaded dressing room mirror. You may as well just not try on anything, especially a bathing suit (more on that later) because even Angelina Jolie would not look good in these. Just try on the clothes at home in front of your skinny mirror.

So which mirror is a true reflection of you? And does it really matter? I see myself a million times a day in a gazillion different ways in all the mirrors at work. And while I can look like I weigh 10 pounds lighter in the Pilates room mirrors and 10 pounds heavier in the TRX area mirrors, instead of driving myself mad – which I did and do –  I’ve decided to be mirror pro-actively remembering the following things:

1)My reflection in any given mirror will always be in error one way or another as there are imperfections not only in me, but in the mirror itself, so really what I’m seeing is not necessarily the truth.

2) I choose to base the reflection of my true self on the way I live my life, the principles I live by and the company I keep, rather than what the mirror tells me.

3)While I still love make-up, clothes, hair and like to see what all that fun stuff looks like, it will never reflect what’s on the inside.


See you in class and the studio!

Image: oneillsdc5
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Kelly Bojan

About Kelly Bojan

Kelly has been involved in the fitness industry for over 15 years. An interest in teaching classes in the 90's became a passion for all aspects of the industry. In addition to being an A.C.E. certified personal trainer and Power Pilates instructor, Kelly has managed several small chain and privately owned clubs. In the past eight years, she was the fitness and program director at a privately owned club. Kelly is the Assistant Program Director at Evolutions helping to generate ideas, quarterly challenges, assist with staff communication and auditing classes.


  1. Lori Ezell | April 23, 2013 at 9:53 am

    LOVE your post, Kelly, particularly the visuals you inspire with your writing style. Thank you for making the time to compose it, and for us to enjoy. xxoo.

  2. Belinda | July 18, 2013 at 3:09 pm

    We have been trained all of our lives to accept the reflection we see in the mirror, when truth is, ALL mirrors have distortion. And most people/businesses have no clue why their mirrors are “fat” or “skinny”. Better to focus on what our amazing human bodies are capable of verse the physical aesthetics of it. Either way, the media makes it hard for all of us to love our bodies and ourselves. Because if we did, there would be no multi-billion dollar cosmetic or weight loss industry. The reflection we see in the mirror shouldn’t matter, but it does, even if we try for it NOT to matter. Trust me, I too was a victim.

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